Thursday, August 12, 2010

A time to vent, a time to cry, and then...time to move on.

Do you ever have one of those days when you seriously question your sanity? When nothing seems to go right? A day when all of the kids seem to be doing their absolute best to drive you crazy...and you seriously think they've succeeded? A day when your decision to spend all day, every day teaching them all by yourself seems like the single most insane thing you've ever done. Well, today was one of those days at my house.

I know I'm not the only parent that has questioned God's plan in giving me children that are much more headstrong than I am. Yes, I also know that they're just being kids. But gosh darn it, they are driving me CRAZY! So, after a day of once again starting my morning out on my knees praying for God's help and guidance, for His help in overcoming my weaknesses (namely yelling too often, losing my temper too frequently, and having a serious shortage of patience), and completely forgetting all about those prayers several hours later after being pushed to my breaking point, I'm back to my prayers for help at the end of the day.

I have recently discovered the absolutely wonderful author, Barbara Kingbury. She writes inspiration fiction. I cannot even begin to tell you how wonderful her books are. However, after reading so many books where the main characters seem to hear God speak to them, I'm jealous. Why is it that I don't hear God speak to me? Maybe I'm not listening hard enough. Of course, it could also be the fact that its so darn noisy in my house with the chirping parakeets, barking dogs, meowing cats and bickering kids that I simply can't hear him. In pondering this question I keep coming back to a quote that Morgan Freeman made while playing God in the movie Evan Almighty. He says that when you ask God for something like patience, does he simply give you patience, or does he give the opportunity to be patient? Maybe God really is answering my prayers, because he is constantly offering me opportunities to be patient. I'm just not very good at it.

After spending a good portion of our afternoon lecturing my children about what happens if they don't do their work, cooperate, stop complaining and basically get with the program. Finally losing it completely and resorting to going to my room for a good cry (aka total meltdown), I'm left with nothing more than a headache and the knowledge that today was most definetely not one of my finer moments. I'm now heading to bed where I will once again pray for guidance secure in the knowledge that some how, some way, this too shall pass.

What about you...have you ever had one those days?

3 comments:

  1. I've said that same thing about praying for patience, then, having that kind of day. I do think it's God's idea of "hands-on learning." ;-) Hope today is a better one.

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  2. Thanks Kris! It was a good day. A really good day. Of course, after yesterday, anything would be an improvement. LOL

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  3. Wow - this sounds like a day I had last week as well. Glad to hear it's not just me.

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